Thoughts on “Woman who launched a 'racist tirade' against two black employees at Michaels is identified as an HR WORKER”

Once again, we see a fine display of what infests the hiring profession in America these days. This video went viral a few weeks ago, but here it is for those who missed it:

I recently came across an “update” on this story which revealed the identity of this sociopath...

Ah, good ole' LinkedIn, offering proof that to be successful in America today all you need is a hot supermodel-style picture on your profile, along with a "network" of 500+ strangers you call "friends."

Further details from the article:

She said she “worked directly with Executive leaders and directors” to “facilitate the effective coordination and delivery of HR services including talent acquisition, performance management, compensation, employee and labor relations employee engagement, and workforce planning.” She said she “addressed poor performance issues and policy violations through progressive discipline and performance management process. Established a formal recruiting and onboarding program, counsel management.” 

She wrote on LinkedIn that she was “experienced in achieving organizational transformation through strategic HR Program and System Implementations.”

She called herself a “responsive and trustworthy business partner who helps leaders redesign their organizational structures to help improve employee engagement, retention, and productivity.” She said she was an “articulate and effective presenter” who demonstrates “leadership, keen analytical and assessment skills. Excels at adapting a responsive leadership style to suit unique cultural environments.”

So…she does...WHAT, exactly, for $90K/year?

From my 1994 Sniglet-a-Day calendar:

Occuflation: Taking menial jobs on your resume and fancying them up, i.e. 'sharpening pencils' becomes 'managing office equipment'

Ah, well, at least she meets the minimum qualifications to work in 21st century America, those qualifications being that she's (1) 26 years old, and (2) attractive. I can’t help but wonder whether Sinai passed over better qualified “old farts” when filling this role, opting to hire the twentysomething twat just because “everyone else is doing it.”

Whatever. I’m confident she’ll find another cushy corporate HR gig paying $90K/year – and, sadly, I’m NOT being sarcastic.

Oh, and to any HR twats who take offense here at being judged based on the actions of one lone lunatic, I ask: How does it feel? You routinely program your ATSs to dismiss our job applications based on whether we're "too old," whether we’re unemployed, whether we have a slight gap on our resumes, whether our last names sound “too ethnic,” whether our street address is in the wrong side of town, and on and on. And, let’s not forget, you’re using an ATS because you’re too fucking stupid to know how to read a resume. So, if you are offended by this story, GOOD.

Cybereason of Boston: Digital natives, only!

More proof that Dan Lyons was right when he wrote, "When It Comes to Age Bias, Tech Companies Don’t Even Bother to Lie..." This job appeared on 12/02/16:

Putting aside the massive amount of stupid in this description (no, I don't fall asleep looking at design blogs, what kind of loser does that?), they outright state they expect the applicant to have "grown up on digital," or, as the term goes, be a "digital native." A digital native is synonymous with "millennial." Yeah, stating you'll only consider people from a certain age bracket is illegal. But, so what? 

EDIT: Looks like they realized their faux pas and edited the requirements. Don't worry, folks, their "Careers" page continues to convey the "we only hire from the young/pretty crowd" message quite nicely (and, as of June 2017 they *still* haven't found a designer)...

EDIT, 07/11/17: Today (July 11), a brand new direct-apply version appeared on StinkedIn...

Cylance of Irvine, CA

Poor, poor Cylance. They just can’t find a senior designer anywhere on this planet.

I first saw this so-called job advertised back in September 2015. Recall, this was immediately after I had completed that six-month gig within Fidelity’s cybersecurity division…

I thought, wow, how perfect of a match can you get here? Not only do I have the recent cybersecurity gig (NIST framework, anyone?) but I’ve got the "above and beyond" experience with Cinema 4D. Logic would dictate that they’d be overjoyed to receive my application.

Ah, but this job is in California, the state that has made age discrimination hip, cool and legal.

Not only did I NOT hear from them, but nobody from any IP address in Irvine even viewed my website/portfolio. One day, I decided to dig a little deeper inside their shiny little website. Here’s what I saw on the “Company” page…

Oh, dear.

Should I just assume they programmed their Workable ATS to ignore every applicant with a female name?

Since then, they were able to add a token woman to this page, later replacing that token woman with a token woman of color. Score one for diversity, fellas!

I dismissed this place and forgot about them. Then the same “job” reappeared in February 2016. I decided to have a little fun with them courtesy of their “Contact Us” page. I sent them a nice little note egged on by some friends I was with who agreed this whole thing was BS…unfortunately I did this using my cell phone so I don’t have a copy of that note, hence I am reconstructing it from memory here. I began with “I applied for your Senior Designer position back in September. My background seemed to be a perfect match; not only do I have Cinema 4D and motion graphics experience, but my last contract was working in the cybersecurity division at a Fortune 500 company. Yet, I did not even earn a telephone screening from you. How bizarre! Even more bizarre, this position is STILL being advertised on your website. Either your recruitment department is incompetent, you are guilty of age discrimination (I am over 30 which is "old" by California standards) or this job is completely FAKE (posted in exchange for local tax credits or to boost your stock price).” I believe I concluded it with a promise to complain to the FTC about them and was ready to again dismiss them when, lo and behold, my website received not one but five viewers in Irvine:

A cross-check with my other visitor stats program confirmed the IP addresses. To add to the hilarity, several of these idiots snooped on my LinkedIn profile. Now, why snoop on my LinkedIn profile? The time for looking at my LinkedIn profile (which has some very nice written reviews…too bad that means nothing to employers like this one!) was back in September 2015 when I first applied for the job. This should have been an early step in reviewing my candidacy. Of course, as we all now know, they didn’t review me at all in September.

Anyways, here’s the email I received from them in response to my note:

Thank you for your interest in Cylance and for recently contacting us. On behalf of the recruiting team, we apologize for the delay in response to your application with us as we haven’t had much movement in terms of hiring for the Senior Designer in recent months; this explains the lack of contact.

 After reviewing your application, we regret to inform you that it has not been selected for further consideration. Again, thank you for your interest in Cylance and your recent note via our Contract Request Form. We wish you the best of luck in your future endeavors.

 “…haven’t had much movement…” What does that even mean? Sorry, but that hardly “explains the lack of contact” (and even that phrase doesn’t make any sense). And, "...we regret to inform you that it has not been selected for further consideration." Well, D'UH!

Clearly, we are not dealing with decent people here. Again, I decided it was best to dismiss them and move on. But it’s so hard to do so when this damned "job" keeps reappearing, as it did again this past September, one full year since this nonsense began. A screenshot from Monster confirms the February job posting date along with the latest one in September 2016:

So, what are we dealing with here? Is it age discrimination? They've got this lovely little banner image montage on their careers page which seems to be devoid of anyone over the age of 30…

Or is the job just fake like most others out there, posted so they can harvest applicants’ personal data which they then sell to the highest bidder?

Or are they just incompetent?

Whether it’s a lack of ethics or a lack of intelligence, the greater question is, who on earth would trust their cybersecurity to a company like this?

Fake job alert: Emulate, Inc.

Emulate, Inc., advertised this job on StinkedIn back in June 2016:

Wow, not even 100 applicants. Must have been a slow week. No problem, just advertise it again -- and they did, two months later on July 11:

Ah, 136 applicants this time, much better! That means they now have 226 applicants, imagine how much fun they're having not bothering to look through all those resumes (yes, mine is one of them, *sigh).  

Seriously, I really would love an explanation as to what the hell is going on here.

EDIT, 10/31/16: They've recently posted a similar design job. How nice to see that they've only received a whopping EIGHT applicants over four days.

EF Education First: Ping-pong and foosball and beer, oh my!

File this one under “NO, Dan Lyons, blatant agediscrimination is NOT diminishing in Stinkassachusetts.”

Same story as always…I applied for many jobs at this company over the past few years, never earning so much as a phone screening. Back in October 2016 they advertised on LinkedIn for a designer, note the massive number of applicants:

That same month, I stumbled upon one of their job postings on Venturefizz…

No further commentary really needed here.

Further evidence that Boston is a true shithole full of lowlifes

As if we even needed any further evidence of that:

Former HubSpot chief marketing officer Mike Volpe was hired by cybersecurity software firm Cybereason for the same role. In July 2015,Volpe was fired by HubSpot, which sells marketing software, in connection with attempts to get a hold of a draft manuscript of a book about the company, Dan Lyons’s “Disrupted: My Misadventure in the Start-Up Bubble.”

Continuing from the BostInno link at the end of the paragraph:

Volpe's firing prompted a federal criminal investigation that eventually closed with no charges being filed, according to The Boston Globe. FBI records, which did not identify anyone, later revealed that there were allegations about "multiple failed attempts to manipulate and extort people." The FBI report also mentioned "tactics such as email hacking and extortion."

But despite Volpe's firing, many in Boston startup's community have rallied around Volpe. In the year since he was fired, Volpe has become an advisor and investor for other startups, including one founded by a former Kayak employee called Drafted. He recently started an angel investment group called Operator.VC with Yoav Shapira, a fellow former HubSpot employee who now works at Facebook's Cambridge office. He also ran a well-attended event in June called Growth Camp. 

My LinkedIn network remains full of poor schmucks who have been rendered to the "unemployable" category for the mere crime of turning "too old" (still unsure where that age begins...is it 35 now?). Not only do we have the age factor held against us, but we are judged by hiring managers on everything from a one-month resume gap to "why did you leave your last job?" Try saying "I was fired" like this Volpe dude was and see where that gets ya.

This guy wins Sleaze of the Year Award, but his career remains unscathed.

Got that, folks? In Boston, it doesn’t matter how sleazy you are. Just fall under the “young entrepreneur” label and you can get away with anything, and everyone will keep kissing your ass. (That anybody would trust their cybersecurity, of all things, to this guy is further evidence that this world has gone mad.)

Queen Associates

I discovered a new clown company posing as a “recruitment firm” on LinkedIn (seems that’s all LinkedIn is good for). They advertised for a “motion graphics designer” position on August 9. I foolishly submitted my resume (and so did 21 other fools – which is quite a low number for a Boston job posted on LinkedIn…am I late in learning that this company isn't to be trusted?). One month later, they advertised an identical position again on LinkedIn, the only difference being the title now had the word “senior” in it. I decided to send these clowns a little email:

When I came across your latest job posting on LinkedIn I almost made the mistake of applying for it. Luckily, I discovered that I had already applied for the identical position you advertised one month earlier (August 9) before making the same mistake twice. The stat at the bottom of that page says you received 21 applicants (including myself), so why you would need to re-advertise the same job when you clearly received a good pool of candidates truly puzzles me. A reputable legitimate recruiter would have contacted every one of these applicants regardless of their qualifications to establish a professional relationship with them and, thus, avoid the need to dump any similar future job postings on these useless impersonal job boards. This is called "networking." I wonder how many of those applicants did your recruitment team bother to contact -- I didn't even receive an acknowledgment (and I'm certain that I won't receive a reply to this email).

I don't take kindly to companies who solicit my personal information for ulterior motives. I have added you to my list of joke "recruitment agencies" to ignore.

Here’s the hilarious reply I received from their “president:”

Your email was forwarded to me, and I wanted to take a moment to respond to you.  I am truly sorry that you’ve been disappointed by the experience you had in posting to one of our jobs.  As much as we strive to make contact with each of our applicants, sometimes a mistake is made.  I apologize that you were not contacted.

As a result, I am working with our HR Director and Recruiting team to talk about ways that we can ensure every candidate receives at a minimum, an acknowledgment of their application.  As you can imagine, with the hundreds of openings and thousands of candidates we encounter each month, it is difficult to provide the level of interaction we would truly like to.

If you have any additional concerns, please feel free to reach out to me directly.  As the President of the firm, our reputation is of utmost importance to me, so please accept my apologies that we missed the mark on providing you a good experience. 

Sincerely, 

Robin Pugh

Hmmmm…no mention of WHY they needed to advertise the same job twice in a job market saturated with designers (she even admits they get thousands of applicants -- so, maybe dumping jobs on job boards like LinkedIn isn't the best way to recruit?)…no feedback as to why I didn't qualify for the job posted...pretty much no mention of anything really, here. Like I said, just another bunch of fakers in a seriously messed up job market.

Babson College

In May 2016 I applied for a “senior instructional multimedia designer” position they advertised. I applied, and heard nothing. I then foolishly applied for a “multimedia and conceptual designer” position they advertised the following August. On October 4, I received their rejection email for the job I applied for back in May. As this was from what appeared to be a functioning email address (careers@babson.edu), I replied back: “I applied for this job IN MAY. That it took your HR department FOUR MONTHS to reject me is nothing short of pathetic. Don't bother sending me a rejection email come January for the multimedia design job for which I foolishly applied last month (and how very bizarre that I didn't even qualify for a telephone screening despite my background in eLearning).” No response received.

I was ready to forget about this latest bunch of nonsense when the first job from May appeared on LinkedIn. I sent them another email (this time to the address shown on their website, hr@babson.edu): “In regards to this position which was first advertised in May...I had assumed you filled this role long before I received your rejection email (forwarded below), but after stumbling across it *again* on LinkedIn, I see that it remains advertised on your website. This is disgusting. Either your hiring team is grossly incompetent (which I stated in my previous email below) or this job is fake, posted to harvest applicants' personal information which you can then sell to the highest bidder (which is what I am now beginning to believe). Shame on you.” Again, no response received.

As of today, October 9, the job (which is obviously fake) remains advertised on their website:

I think this makes for a mighty fine lesson to their undergraduates (each paying $60K/year to attend) in how they should expect to be treated as job applicants after graduation by potential employers.

Interactions LLC

This dinky little company in Franklin, Stinkassachusetts, advertised for an “interactive and print designer” in September 2016. Once again, I encountered an online job application that was both frustrating and downright offensive.

First, the application was very poorly designed in that anyone self-employed will have difficulty completing the work history fields of "company name/address" and "manager" (remember, we’re in a “gig” economy now, so why aren’t companies adjusting their job applications to reflect this?). 

And then they did what so many of these dumb online applications do, which was to demand references right up front. Now that I know these companies are posting fake jobs in order to collect and then sell our personal information, I absolutely refuse to disclose the intimate details of my clients/colleagues. That would just be stupid on my part. They’ll get this very personal information after they’ve met with me and are ready to offer me a job (cue the laughter).

Finally, we get to the offensive part. They demand to know what YEAR I graduated college.

Now, for what other purpose would they demand this information other than to reject me for being too old? Combined with the job description requirements of a mere “two to three years of experience,” it is clear that they are only interested in recruiting someone under the age of 25.

I went ahead and submitted my application merely as a joke. Sure enough, within four days I received their darling rejection email, “At this time we are electing to proceed forward with candidates that more closely align with the requirements of this role.” I have 18 years of experience, so I’m pretty sure the “requirements” they are referring to have nothing to do with skills.

Here’s where it gets funny. They state on their website that they “turn frustrating customer care experiences into productive conversations.” I decided to test this claim, and sent them a nice little message via their Facebook page, “I’d like to share with you what a FRUSTRATING experience I had completing your online job application for the Interactive/Print Designer role…” and referencing the above quote about "turning frustrating customer care experiences into productive conversations." Did they seize the opportunity to transform this frustrating experience into a productive conversation? Nope, I received no response or acknowledgement whatsoever, which just goes to show how skilled this company is in "turning frustrating customer care experiences into productive conversations.” These folks never learned that every job applicant is a potential future customer.

A quick peek at the reviews on their aforementioned Facebook page reveals a seriously rotten company…

Of course, I really don’t think there are any non-rotten companies in Stinkassachusetts.

ManTech and the Department of Defense

I first came across this third-shift design this third-shift design job jbeing advertised by some dinky staffing company called ManTech back in February (it was actually posted in January). I never bothered applying despite being fully qualified because I did not have the required security clearance. When I saw this job was still being advertised the other day (it's now September, seven months later), I sent them an email asking if they are still trying to fill this position, adding, “I am a graphic designer experienced in 3D modeling/animation (Cinema 4D), however, I do not have the required security clearance.” 

I received the following reply: "Thank you for your interest in ManTech International Corporation. Job requisition 81836BR is still available - you can apply for this position at:  http://www.jobs.net/jobs/ManTech/en-us. Once you have applied, let me know and I will send your status request to the recruiter."

Okay, so she's not concerned that I don't have the security clearance. Perhaps they’ve finally realized they can’t be too picky here and will work on getting security clearance for the candidate after they’re hired, which is completely doable. I went to the application page, which asked me to check what security level I currently hold. I said “none” and received the following message on my screen: "Thank you for your interest in ManTech's position 81836BR: Senior Graphics Designer (3D Animation). Your answer indicates you do not hold the necessary clearance required for consideration for this position." The End.

I relayed this back to the clown at ManTech -- does this idiot not know how to read? why did she tell me to go ahead and apply when I clearly stated I didn't have the security clearance? -- who replied, “Thank you for the follow up.  When a job requisition states clearance level - we must hire someone with an active clearance at the level identified.  We hope that you will continue to review our job opportunities and thank you again for your interest in ManTech.”

My final response: “A job opening that remains unfilled for a whopping seven months is not a real job opening...I think I'll look elsewhere.”

I was tempted to contact the Department of Defense who supposedly is the end client for this gig, but failed to find a single contact page or link. Is our own DoD guilty of stupidity here? After nine months they still can’t find a designer with 3D modeling skills (not every graphic designer knows 3D) who is willing and eager to work the midnight shift AND has top security clearance. I mean, c’mon, how many people are out there who meet these requirements?

I really really want to believe that our DoD cannot possibly be this incompetent, so I’m going to conclude the job is, like every other “job” listed by these clown staffing agencies, completely FAKE.

1986 vs. 2015

I got my very first job in the summer of 1986. I had just completed my first year of college (for a useless degree in Business Administration – seriously, kids, this is a degree to avoid, it’s just as bad as design!) and had just begun summer break. I was looking at the “want ads” in the Sunday Pittsburgh Press and saw one for a typist. It was with a temp agency, Allegheny Personnel. I called them, they invited me in where they tested my typing (I blew them away with my speed) and they told me they could probably find me something “starting tomorrow.” I thought surely getting a job can’t be this easy, especially in this town that was still suffering from severe unemployment due to the steel mills closing. Sure enough, I got home and they called as soon as I walked in the door with a job for me starting the next day. Even sweeter was the pay: $5/hour! That was a whopping $1.65 (30%) more than the minimum wage.

I had several assignments that summer through that agency, and all were wonderful experiences. The following summer, I called Allegheny Personnel saying I was again available for temporary typing work, and they immediately placed me at Mellon Bank. Again, it was a wonderful experience, and it lasted through the whole summer. When I had to quit to return to school, they threw me a party and the one supervisor I had took me out to lunch to a very nice restaurant.

Imagine that, a temp worker getting thrown a farewell party!

Even more shocking was the diverse age groups I encountered in all of the places I worked during those two summers. There were a few young kids like myself, but also lots of women in their 30s, 40s, 50s and even 60s.

Now, let’s look at how I was treated at Fidelity Investments back in 2015. I look back on this experience with more sadness than I should as it is no doubt is the last job I’ll ever have in America. When the CIO who hired me abruptly left the company, the remaining team decided they had no use for me and shifted me over to a different boss not once but twice – and neither of them wanted anything to do with me, either. It became clear immediately that this six-month contract would not be converting to a permanent role as initially promised. I spent the majority of those last four months doing absolutely nothing and being completely ignored. At times, entering that building in the morning very much felt like walking into high school detention, where I had to sit in silence all day and think about what I did wrong.

My final few weeks came and went in the same fashion with nobody saying one word to me, right down to my last day when I packed up my desk, turned in my security badge, quietly left the building and went to my car where I broke down and cried, wondering what kind of sick joke was this for life to play on me. I realize I made some bad mistakes in my life, but this is just a little bit ridiculous.

The worst part of Fidelity's behavior was that when I was offered the job by that CIO I had just received my first offer to teach English in South Korea. I never never never never NEVER would have turned down that opportunity to start a new life for myself had I known I'd be unemployed again in six months. I gave Fidelity's HR clowns multiple chances to "right this wrong" but they just didn't care. 

I can't help but wonder had I stayed in Pittsburgh would my last job in America have been this bad. More importantly, would I have completed my "last job in America" at the age of 47. Whatever. I suppose it’s for the best that my last job in America was the worst, ensuring I’ll have no regrets and no remorse when I board that plane that takes me far, far away from here.

Massachusetts: The NO Networking state

(I've abstained from spelling "Massachusetts" in my usual snarky fashion as I'd like this page to properly appear in a web search. Rest assured, my opinion of this state remains unchanged.) 

As I look back at my early days of running from one temp gig to another in this miserable state trying to prove myself as a designer and build up a network of clients and contacts, I can now see what a complete waste of time and futile effort it all was. I already wrote about Cramer as one good example; here are a few more, spanning the time from 1999 to 2003.

Vantage Partners

Way back when, either late 1999 or early 2000, I was placed here on a temp presentation design gig through PSG. As always, I did a fine job, earning a glowing review in the end, “Please tell her that she was the best designer I’ve ever worked with!” As always, I naively said to myself, terrific! There’s another satisfied customer who will sure call me back whenever they have the need for a designer! (Yeah, right.)

So, here we are, 16 years on, and they have to put out an advertisement and solicit loads of resumes for this one dinky five-month stint. 

How sad that they never could be bothered to establish a long-term relationship with me (or, apparently, anyone else).

Even funnier (or sadder, depending on your POV), I got a call from TCG checking in to see whether I’d like to make myself available for some temp work. I asked, “Well, that depends, what have you got? Anything worth my time?” The rep replied she’s got “two great opportunities currently open, one with Vantage Partners, and another one with Cambridge Systematics.” Recall, I briefly mentioned a very bad experience with the latter company here.

Oh, good grief. Sixteen years on, and it’s the same dinky companies filling the same old roles with temps. It's like musical chairs except with jobs instead of chairs.  

Aramark

Back in 2003, PSG called me about a presentation design gig with Aramark. My rep (a very nice guy, unfortunately he moved to another state) said that the client had given the task of designing a PPT template to someone there internally and they were NOT happy at all with what he did. Based on the details he gave me, I deduced this person was not a designer, just someone who thinks they’re a designer because they knew PPT. I “accepted the mission,” drove up to their Norwell location and met with the girl in charge of the project. She showed me what this other “designer” had done -- a plain red background with the Aramark logo in white on top, text placeholders, and that was it. I came home created three template designs which included imagery and some 3D elements. Her email response to me was that I blew them away with my designs, “We are all very impressed with what you’ve given us!” After they picked a template they sent me slides to incorporate into the new design. Again, they were happy with everything and, again, I foolishly said to myself, “Excellent, another satisfied client that I can count on to feed me some project work in the future!”

Never heard from them again. They advertised for a designer twice in the past few years, and I applied both times (in May 2014, and in December 2015). I was automatically rejected by their ATS without anyone even looking at my website. 

Staples

Just like with Aramark, PSG called me with a PPT design job at Staples back in 2003. They had no PPT in their corporate brand back then, thus I was hired to fix this. I gave them several template designs that they loved, they picked one and I designed their slides to match the new template. Again, glowing feedback to PSG. Again, this led to NOTHING.

I look back at these joke jobs and wonder, why did it have to be like this? The only reason I can think of is that Stinkassachusetts…stinks.

Cramer Productions

Right down the road from Analog Devices is another wonderful Stinkassachusetts company. Back in early 2003, I was feeling the effects of the dot-com bust. After subsisting on a temporary per-diem transcription gig for $13/hour (same salary as I had made a decade earlier), I finally had some luck with PSG in getting some design work (yeah, it’s hard to believe but PSG actually did find people work back then!). They placed me with Cramer as a presentation designer.

Once again, I performed flawlessly. Many of my designs made their way to their “design spotlight wall” and what was initially a one-week stint turned into several months of work. But, like every temp gig, the work eventually dried up and they didn’t need me anymore. I still feel foolish for how naïve I was back then, actually thinking I had made progress in obtaining a happy client who will surely remember me when they need a designer again. Barely one month later, and I see Cramer advertising for a presentation designer on Monster. WTF? I called my PSG rep and asked him what the hell is going on? Why didn’t these people want me back for this role? Why in the world would they not hire someone who is able to start working immediately (i.e., not need any training) but instead choose to harvest resumes and perform tedious interviews? I practically broke down crying asking him what did I do for them to hate me. He said, “I promise they don’t hate you, they loved you! I don’t know what’s going on with them but I'll try to find out!” (He never did.)

Over the next thirteen years I’d see Cramer advertise this exact same job and, like a fool, I’d apply, but I never even qualified for a telephone screening (most recently as January 2016). In another state this whole thing would seem bizarre, but this is Stinkassachusetts. 

Remember, don’t expect a long-term business relationship with anyone in Stinkassachusetts as your skills, talents and work ethic are meaningless here. Nobody wants to network with you, and nobody wants to be your friend. 

Analog Devices

My experience with this company was a fine example of how unfriendly and downright nasty the people in this state truly are.

Back in 2000, I was a newly minted designer struggling to find work and paying my bills by going from one temporary gig to another (I barely had a portfolio and only two years of anything resembling design on my resume). TCG placed me here for a temporary gig that consisted of recreating diagrams from scratch in a program called Canvas; there was a “to do” box that up until the end was consistently full of printouts of diagrams needing to be recreated this way. After a few weeks, TCG did their typical check-in with their client to see how things were going with the temp they sent them. The feedback they passed along to me was that I was doing awesome work and “keep it up!”

There are several things that stand out in my memory about this place. One was the Mac I had to use which crashed an average eight times per day (this contributed to my failure to fall in love with anything made by Apple – the biggest reason being my observation that Apple products turn normal people into jerks, but that’s a post for another day). The second and bigger thing was that the people here were the most god-unfriendly people I’ve ever met. My “boss” was some nasty guy named Paul; he was about my age, and not once did I see him smile in my time there. Then there was their full-time “designer” who always carried a nasty scowl on her face; I’d pass her walking back to my cubicle and say “hi” and she’d say nothing but would just glare at me. Okay, I’m not going to make friends in this place, I said to myself on more than one occasion. But, hey, I’m not here to make friends, I’m here to prove that I’m a good worker ant and that I know what I’m doing. Maybe this job will go permanent (ha!) or they’ll need someone down the road (again, ha!).

One day (can’t really recall how much time went by after the initial positive feedback from TCG, maybe a month) I went to retrieve work in the “to do” box only to find it empty. And, over the course of the next week, this became the norm, i.e., there was no work to do. I figured things were just slowing down and would pick up again. Then one Friday I came home to a message on my answering machine from TCG telling me to not go in to work on Monday. I called them and was told that “the HR rep said she’s had reports of a lot of eye-rolling with you and hence don’t want you back.” I said WTF? What on earth are they talking about? Firstly, I went through my average day in virtual isolation -- I’d retrieve a printout from the “to do” box, return to my cubicle, complete the diagram, and repeat the procedure. I pretty much didn’t interact with anybody and, as I already pointed out, nobody in this place wanted to interact with me. Where specifically did I piss someone off here? I then pointed out that they had nothing but good things to say about me only a month back, so what exactly happened to make them change their opinion of me? “I know!” my rep said, “I don’t understand this, either! But this is all they’d tell me!”

That this group of unfriendly unsociable shitheads would dismiss me or anyone for being “unsociable” is nothing short of hilarious. I told my TCG rep that I demanded to know the reason I was let go; I also told her about how there was nothing to work on as of late. She said she’d try to find out more, but I never did get any further feedback and, since I found another gig almost immediately, I let the whole thing go.

The nicest memory I have was going in the next day after being “fired” (a Saturday) to retrieve my things from my desk. They voided my security badge and dumped all my things in a box and left it with the security guard.

I often think about this experience, and sixteen years on I still wonder just what the hell happened here. My best guess is that they probably overestimated to TCG their need for a designer, they no longer needed me and didn’t have the guts to admit it, so the easiest way to get rid of me was to just make me the bad guy. And, where I initially concluded that encountering such a rotten bunch of degenerates was an isolated incident, I now know better. The people in this state suck. 

Dan Lyons: From hero to clueless in 160 days

I’ve already mentioned “Disrupted” here previously. Finally, I exclaimed when this book came out last April, someone speaks out on behalf of us “old farts” being kicked out of the job market! We finally have a spokesman to champion our cause…okay, I know there is no hope that one guy is going to cause any significant change in today’s fucktarded hiring practices, but it was nice to see a little attention given to the issue.

Imagine how disappointed I was to read his article in Boston Magazine saying that things are getting better.

Dude, are you fucking serious? You think you have single-handedly fixed everything with your book, and now everything’s just fine and dandy based on the fact that YOU are no longer struggling to find a job? Newsflash: NOTHING has changed here. Things are just as bad as ever. I’m even noticing that the age discrimination is getting even MORE blatant than before. For example...

Companies now routinely incorporate pictures of their under-40 workforces all across their websites, like this one (DraftKings). 

Forget over 40, is there anyone over 30 here?

Next, we've got Formlabs who’s been advertising this same dumb design job since December 2014. I applied, and heard nothing. Gee, I wonder why. Note the hammock in this image which used to be on their Ventirefizz page…a hammock, ferfuckssake!!!

Here’s an ad for a graphic designer with Perkins+Will, who blatantly demands the candidate not be over the age of 23 with the “1-2 years’ experience” requirement. 

Finally, there was this gem of a headline that appeared in my news feed just the other day: Legendary Apple Engineer Gets Rejected For Genius Bar Job

No, Mr. Lyons, nothing’s getting better. And, that you’re using EMC as your example of companies behaving better is just laughable -- here’s my experience with EMC back in early 2015 (I am positive that the hiring manager’s lack of enthusiasm in offering me the job boiled down to the fact that I’m *old*).

An *explosion* of design/creative jobs at Newmark Grubb Knight Frank

They advertised a design job directly on LinkedIn on January 5, 2016,receiving 132 applicants. I foolishly applied and was promptly and efficiently ignored.

The same job was advertised again – as a new job – on February 11, when it received 114 applicants (no, I didn’t bother applying). That makes 246 total applicants at this point.

On March 13, it appeared for a THIRD time, receiving 120 applicants. We’re up to 366 now.

And here it is again on May 9, with 108 applicants.

After the 02/11 appearance, I decided to send them an old-fashioned complaint letter via their Facebook page. I came right out and asked just what kind of game are they playing here, listing all the links and offering a few choice words, “Is your ‘Recruiting Coordinator,’ Banesa Vasquez, so incompetent that out of 246 applicants she couldn’t find even one qualified designer in all this time, particularly in a city where designers are a dime a dozen? Word of advice: People are starting to take notice of companies posting fake jobs, like this one. I strongly suggest you get your act together. Not only do you look very bad here, but you make America look bad.”

No response received. 

After the 05/09 appearance, I sent an email to both of their "public relations" contacts (found on their website). I repeated the details from the Facebook message, pointed out how disingenuous they appear here, and, “Do you keep re-advertising it because you get a federal tax break for being a 'job creator' (despite the job being fake)? Or, are you just trying to fool your competitors into thinking you're expanding? Or, are you soliciting applicants' personal information via their resumes for ulterior motives -- for example, using the company names obtained from their work histories as a source of potential sales leads? Or, is this just an astonishing case of incompetence?” I ended it with suggesting that they apologize to all 437 applicants who were duped into thinking they were applying for a real job.

No response received.

Finally, I wrote a letter to the CEO, Barry Gosin, via snail mail with signature confirmation: 

After being ignored by your recruiting representative, your Facebook administrator, and your public relations team, it is clear that your company simply does not respond to any digital communication, hence I am sending this letter via USPS. I have attached a copy of the email I sent to your public relations team in regards to the graphic designer job that you have been advertising ad nauseam on LinkedIn since January. I questioned why you continue to post this job even after you amassed several hundred applicants. I also pointed out that I send a similar message to your Facebook administrators and I received NO response. Not surprisingly, I received no response from your public relations team. You are quite obviously a company with no ethics. I am sending a copy of this letter along with the enclosures to the US Department of Justice’s Consumer Protection Branch in the hopes they will investigate this matter, as I am convinced you are harvesting applicants’ personal information for ulterior motives.

About a week after sending this, I received a phone call from some girl who could barely speak coherently. She said that they found an internal candidate for that job -- surprise! the job was COMPLETELY FAKE FROM THE START! -- and the only other design job they currently have open is in their New York office and would I be interested in hearing more about it. I told them I have no desire to do business with them. She said "well, whenever you see another job on our website you're more than happy to apply." More than happy to apply. Yep, that's what she said...unbelievable that they would put such an inexperienced kid in charge of damage control here. Good grief. I hung up the phone and sincerely hoped that this would put an end to the fake job postings (because I really do feel sorry for people who just aren't as aware as I am of what's going on). 

Boy, was I wrong. Almost immediately there was a virtual explosion of design/creative jobs with this shady company on StinkedIn (screenshot taken on 08/16/16), including one in Boston, *sigh*:

They sure showed me! "Nobody's gonna tell us we can't advertise fake jobs!" (As of June 2017, they continue to flood the job boards with these fake design jobs...)

Fake job alert: Veritas Genetics

Veritas Genetics advertised for a graphic designer directly on Indeed on August 5, 2016. Take a look at the nice little statistic in bold at the bottom: 

"More than 100 people have already applied to this job on Indeed." Wow. Of course, I applied when that counter was below 50 (cue the laughter).

One would think that "more than 100 applicants" would be sufficient to find a qualified designer. But, I guess one would be wrong in thinking that, as this appeared on StinkedIn five days later...and take a look at how many applicants they received there:

So, they received nearly 300 applicants. Surely that's enough to find one qualified designer!
Alas, look what just appeared today, October 6, as a brand new job on LinkedIn. *Sigh*...

I can't help but notice that the major difference between the two job descriptions is the presence of a new "requirement," which is "1 to 3 years" of experience. This means nobody over the age of 25 need apply. 

EDIT, 11/23/16: Here we go again, "new" job posting on November 23, already up to 109 foolish applicants who haven't been paying attention...

EDIT, 03/31/17: It's baaaaaaaaack...current count of new suckers is at 53...