Skyrocketing salaries in Stinkassachusetts

Here we have another spectacular opportunity in our booming job market where salaries are starting to really skyrocket:

Award Maker, Henry's Jewelry & Awards - Lawrence, MA 01840
Here is the list of requirements:

• Bilingual – English and Spanish written and spoken (Required)

• Strong Math Skill

• Being Creative!

• Knowledge in Microsoft (Excel, Word, etc.)

• Knowledge in graphic design software like CorelDRAW, Photoshop

• Knowledge power tools (drills, circular saw, etc.)

• Available 6 days a week (Monday-Saturday)

So, to recap, the applicant must have creative design experience, must be proficient in specialized design software (which one acquires with a good deal of work experience), must know how to use power tools (again, experience!), must be bilingual, and must be willing to work six days a week (because screw the 40 hour workweek!). 

Salary is a whopping $10 to $13/hr.